Some Kind of Wonderful

This is (obviously) the German-language poster for this movie, the title of which translates literally to Is She Not Wonderful? but would probably be Isn't She Wonderful? if we were translating to something that actually made sense. But what I particularly like here are the taglines: "They show feeling and have fun. Her whole world is turned upside down" (literally "on its head"). What does that first part mean? I really can't figure out the colloquial version of "show feeling." Also, no one in this movie shows their feelings except maybe Emo Stoltz, who is, like, constantly drawing in his journal and brushing his hair out of his eyes.
Eric Stoltz: Gee, I wish I didn't have to work in a mechanic's shop to earn my college money, especially because I don't even want to go to college.
His Dad: YOU'RE GOING!! You would be the first person in our family to go, and it would make me proud, son.
Eric Stoltz: Whatever. I'm just going to look at that pretty, popular girl, the one I love from afar.
[he GAZES at Lea Thompson and also at his GREASE-SMEARED HANDS that indicate his SOCIAL POSITION in relation to HERS]
Mary Stuart Masterson: Come on, best friend! Let's drive to school in my Mini, a car that proves I am quirky! Also I have a boy's haircut.
Eric Stoltz: I'm just so emo about that popular girl.
[he EMOS AROUND, but in a HOT WAY]
Elias Koteas: Aww, poor baby can't get the popular girl. Boo hoo.
[he FUCKS with them and gets DETENTION]
Eric Stoltz: Get lost, skinhead.
[meanwhile, at his HOUSE]
His Teen Sister: Why are you so weirrrrrrrrrrd? Everyone at school says you are. But I want to be popular!!
Candance Cameron, his baby sister: Look how precocious I am! Here are some facts.
His Parents: College!
Eric Stoltz: Why do you all have to be UP ON ME all the TIME?! God!
[he EMOS around some more, and SKETCHES Lea Thompson from AFAR, because that is NOT CREEPY AT ALL]
Lea Thompson: My boyfriend is hot, but kind of a jerk. Oh well, I'll skip class to bone him anyway.
[she gets DETENTION]
Eric Stoltz: I know!! I'll get detention so I can hang out with her!
[his plan BACKFIRES HORRIBLY when she basically HITS ON a TEACHER to get out of it]
Elias Koteas: Now we are stuck in detention together, sucker.
Eric Stoltz: I see you are carving something in that desk. Perhaps we can find common ground in our artistry.
[Elias Koteas RIPS OFF the top of the DESK he is CARVING to SHOW Eric Stoltz and they have a MOMENT]
Eric Stoltz: I think I'm ready to ask out the popular girl.
Mary Stuart Masterson: Please. You're too shy, and she's too bitchy, and I'm too in love with you. I mean...I'm not in love with you. At all. You're my best friend!
[she uses SOME DUDE to try to make him JEALOUS]
Some Dude: Everyone thinks you're a lesbian, you know. I think it's the haircut and the bad attitude.
Mary Stuart Masterson: Shut up. My friend will be back in an hour.
Some Dude: Do you know how much damage we could do to each other in an hour?*
Mary Stuart Masterson: Ew.
[meanwhile, at the MALL, because this is CALIFORNIA, after all]
Lea Thompson: I'm sick of you, rich jerky boyfriend! I just might dump you, you know! Your access to these white, pleated, 10-inch-inseam Bermuda shorts is REVOKED.
Rich Jerk Boyfriend: Ha! Who'll have you?! You're sloppy seconds now! Hot, 17-year-old sloppy seconds.
Eric Stoltz: Will you go out with me?
Lea Thompson: Yes. And this is not at all related to the fact that I am trying to make my rich jerk boyfriend jealous.
[everyone SPECULATES for, like, DAYS about whether she is PULLING HIS LEG by agreeing to DATE him]
His Teen Sister: This is crazy. Why the hell would she date you?
His Mom: Is she nice, at least?*
His Teen Sister: Mother, the girl is sex.*
Candace Cameron: Gross.
Mary Stuart Masterson: She's trying to trick you! I'd bet my hands.*
Eric Stoltz: I wouldn't take that bet.*
Mary Stuart Masterson: Look. The only things I care about in this goddamn world are me, my drums, and you.* So you can take it or leave it.
Eric Stoltz: Leave it? I guess? I mean, your hair is pretty bad.
His Teen Sister: I overheard the rich jerk talking in the mall. They're going to beat you up at the party on Saturday. I want to be popular, but not bad enough to get you pummeled.
Eric Stoltz: Then I have a plan. It involves using all my college money to buy some earrings. This will all make sense in a second, I promise.
His Dad: It better, you idiot. COLLEGE MONEY!!
[Saturday ARRIVES and Mary Stuart Masterson is CHAUFFEURING them around on their DATE, because that is a FUN TIME and would not KILL HER SOUL at ALL]
Eric Stoltz: First, I will take you to the finest restaurant. Then, I will get you into the art museum after hours, where I have hung a portrait of you that I painted from memory, since I have been gazing at you forever. Then, we shall proceed to the band shell, where we will talk about our lives.
Lea Thompson: Ugh. Why are you so nice? You don't even know me. You're using me just as much as I'm using you. What is that hanging in that museum? My SOUL? No, it's my FACE.*
[all the WHILE, Mary Stuart Masterson WEEPS ALONE on the STEPS of the BAND SHELL]
Eric Stoltz: Well, time for the party and some comeuppance of someone.
[they GO to the PARTY and CONFRONT the rich jerk, who is about to PUMMEL Eric Stoltz until...]
Elias Koteas: I didn't realize the rich jerk lived in a henhouse. Must be a henhouse, because I see nothin' but CHICKEN. SHIT.*
[he and his POSSE look THREATENING, which is usually enough to SCARE rich jerks]
Lea Thompson: Oh, and?
[she SLAPS the rich jerk and it is AWESOME]
Eric Stoltz: Well, I guess we took care of him! Or Elias Koteas did, or whatever. So now we can kiss!
Lea Thompson: Wait. This ending is too much like Pretty in Pink. Maybe this time, the quirky, funny friend can end up with the dreamy, yet poor protagonist.
Eric Stoltz: This will give hope to unrequited crushes everywhere!!
[he RUNS after Mary Stuart Masterson and they KISS and it is GREAT but you kind of WONDER how he got over Lea Thompson SO QUICKLY]
Mary Stuart Masterson: Hooray! I don't need boobs or a good haircut to get a man!
Eric Stoltz: Here. The earrings represent my future, and now you are my future, so you should put them on.
Mary Stuart Masterson: Wait, what? Okay. I guess this is still part of your still-unexplained, nonsensical plan?
Eric Stoltz: Yes. Now shhhhh.


Laura said...

Nicely done. This movie was always very much a poor man's "Pretty in Pink," but I do appreciate that the pretty, popular girl grows a set. Also, Elias Koteas (or Andrew Dice Clay, as I remembered him - again with the PIP mix-ups) looks about 40 in this movie.

BeckEye said...

It's not even one of my favorite '80s teen movies, but I watch it EVERY TIME it's on. And it's on a lot. I always had a thing for Eric Stoltz.

Emily said...

"Hooray! I don't need boobs or a good haircut to get a man!"

This is pretty much my mantra. Also I owe MSM for her positive portrayal of chick drummers with short hair. ;)