50 First Dates
[it is HAWAII]
A Bunch of Random Women: I spent an amazing week with this dude in Hawaii! But he can't be tied down because he's a [random lie goes here].
Adam Sandler: Yep, that's right. A different girl every week. That's how I roll. That, and being a vet at some sort of Sea World-type place.
[some HIJINKS occur with some SEA CREATURES, including a VOMITING WALRUS]
Adam Sandler: Now for some breakfast!
[he SEES Drew Barrymore and INSTANTLY falls in love with her]
Adam Sandler: My ways have changed upon seeing her.
Drew Barrymore: Join me for breakfast! Let's be adorable and build things out of waffles! That is how you can tell I am childlike and quirky!
Large Hawaiian Diner Employees: Don't you hurt our favorite customer!
Drew Barrymore: Meet me here tomorrow.
[he DOES, and it turns out she has a SHORT-TERM MEMORY disorder]
Drew Barrymore: Who the fuck are you!?
Adam Sandler: Whaaaaat?!?
Her Dad: Don't mess with my daughter.
Sean Astin: Don't meth with my thithter. I have a lithp.
[they TRICK her into thinking she has NOT had a TERRIBLE ACCIDENT and watch "The Sixth Sense" EVERY DAY]
Adam Sandler: But I like her so much!
[he does a SERIES of TRICKS so he can SEE her that involve his PET PENGUIN and ROB SCHNEIDER]
Rob Schneider: Thanks for still giving me work, buddy.
Drew Barrymore: Wait a minute! I have a head injury?! I can't remember more than a day? This is terrible!!
[she FREAKS out, but the next day she FORGETS so it's COOL]
Adam Sandler: I love youuuuuu!!
Drew Barrymore: Please don't bother me anymore.
[she goes to live in a NURSING HOME for HOTTIES with BRAIN DAMAGE]
Adam Sandler: I can't live without youuuuu!
[he FINDS her and she has been PAINTING him from her DREAMS]
Drew Barrymore: You're the man of my dreams.*
Adam Sandler: I sure am!!
[they live on a BOAT and he studies FISH or something and they have a BABY and every day she watches a VIDEO to be like HELLO YOU HAVE BRAIN DAMAGE but somehow it is HAPPY?]