[it is the SIXTIES]
Jennifer Hudson: Listen to me sing! Damn! Good thing I'm the lead in this group.
Beyonce: I better get an Oscar for this shit. Too bad they didn't give me enough lines to ruin the movie.
[she POSES]
Eddie Murphy: You ladies wanna sing back up for me?
J. Hud, Beyonce and That Other One: Hells yeah!
[they go on a WHIRLWIND rise to FAME and find LOVE and LIFE along the way]
Jamie Foxx: Hey, fine lady...
Jennifer Hudson: Who, me?
Jamie Foxx: Uh...yes.
[they have a SCANDALOUS affair]
Jennifer Hudson's Brother: Hey, guess what? You're not singing lead. Oh, and you're out of the band. Sorry.
Jennifer Hudson: I'm not? I'm NOT? Check this out.
[she SINGS her HEART out, with LITTLE to NO effect on the other CHARACTERS]
Jennifer Hudson: Oh, they're gone. And I'm pregnant. Shit.
Jamie Foxx: Girl, you know I really meant you when I said all that "fine lady" stuff, right?
Beyonce: Observe my beauty, for it is like a Starbucks latte: market-researched and bland.
[she POSES]
Eddie Murphy: I'm not on drugs. Wait, yes I am.
That Other One: I love you still.
[we are in DETROIT]
Jennifer Hudson: I have found my voice once more.
Beyonce: You have? Good, 'cause I'm stealing it.
[she POSES whilst STEALING]
Jennifer Hudson: Whatevs, I know it was all his fault anyway.
[she FORGIVES everything]
Jamie Foxx: J. Hud, you have borne my child. I realize now the error of all my ways.
[he becomes HUMAN]
Beyonce: Reunion concert? Great.
[she POSES]
Jennifer Hudson: Yeah, but who got the Oscar nod? Suckas!!!

1 comment:

Reverend AC said...

Wait, there is voice stealing? Like an The Little Mermaid? Sweet!